I see a lot of articles devoted to self-care and focusing on your own needs. Nothing wrong with this. If you are the type of person who ignores their own needs in favor of others, then this can be very good advice.
However, as a society we sometimes lose site of the balance between caring for ourselves and caring for others.
I know people who have done all the things. They have engaged in therapy (rarely a bad idea in my opinion), reflected on themselves and their needs, established healthy boundaries with others, and taken mental health days to focus on themselves. Again, all wonderful things to do for yourself. Many of these people, though, will continue to feel less than fulfilled and often experience anxiety and depression.
There is one practice often missing in people’s self-care routine: Helping others
I don’t mean denying yourself or your boundaries. Sometimes, though, focusing on those less fortunate than you and offering support can give you the mental health boost you have been missing.
I know, we are all busy and thinking about fitting something like volunteering into our already packed schedules might feel like the opposite of self-care. Perhaps you take one of those mental health days this year and volunteer for an organization that helps others and speaks to your values. As is always my recommendation, notice how you feel during and after.
Research has shown that volunteering can have a positive impact on our overall mental health.
Sometimes too much of a good thing is not helpful. There is such a thing as too much introspection. Getting out of your own head and focusing on helping someone else is a great way to reduce anxiety. When we are helping others, we don’t hyper focus on our own problems. Helping someone less fortunate than you can also put your own problems into perspective.
Volunteering can boost a sense of social connection which in turn may boost our mood. Volunteering can also give us a sense of purpose and meaning.
In a world that feels more and more out of our control, helping others can give us a sense of empowerment.
People often ask me what to do about the anxiety they feel about the state of the world. Unfortunately, a lot of things in this world are out of our control. This can feel destabilizing and anxiety producing. Focusing on the things you can control can help. It is remarkable how actions on a small scale such as helping someone who is struggling can help us feel as though we are having a positive impact on the world.
Of course, like most things, this is not a fix-it-all for anxiety or any other mental health issue. However, I think it is a valuable tool to keep in our toolbox of self-care ideas.
If you are continuing to struggle with your mental health, please reach out to a mental health professional. For those in Colorado and Wyoming, I provide in person and online therapy in Colorado and online therapy for folks in Wyoming. Call me for a complimentary 15 minute phone consultation.
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